You would think that my life was perfect if you got a glimpse of me today. Well, it comes to no surprise life knows how to throw some funny curve balls at you! After being engaged to the love of my life, I feared most days that things seemed to have been going so well it was almost too good to be true. I somehow was able to bury deep into my brain and tap into all of what I had encountered as a child. All until I had no choice other than to confront my fears and emotional instability.
I was 14 years old when I had only dreamed of visiting the beautiful island of Puerto Rico. At 27 years of age, it dawned on me that one of my dreams had become reality. I could not believe what my next steps would be; there was an overflow of happy thoughts and unexplainable joy. I had been dating this wonderful person for about 8 years, at the time, my boyfriend. I had the wonderful opportunity to accompany my church family to the beautiful island on a missionary trip. My boyfriend decided that it would be the perfect time and place to ask me to be his wife. Indeed, he proposed on our trip to visit “El Morro.”
El Morro is one of the most visited places on the island. It holds history from when the Spanish Civil War took place. This place was designed to guard the entrance to the San Juan Bay and defend the Spanish colonial port city of San Juan from seaborne enemies. This place holds so much history, including some sacrificial love stories during the Spanish-American war in 1898.
My now husband, did not know the significance of proposing to me at this location, at least not the way it influenced my life. As a child, I grew up in a home where I witnessed a vast amount of dysfunction around me. I dealt with abusive relationships between my mother and her significant others at the time. In addition, I dealt with many different experiences that affected my life. I thought getting married would be the worst thing I could possibly do to myself. Of course, I dated guys, and when I did, I honestly wasn’t sure what to expect. I wasn’t sure if it was just a matter of time before they were comfortable enough to physically or verbally harm and dare I say, abuse me. Nevertheless, in my teenage years I began to meet different people. I met someone in specific which I thought had the perfect family. Being welcomed into their home led me to realize there were men in the universe who respected women. It opened my eyes to know that it did not matter what family you came from, or what kind of past you had lived, real genuine love was possible and did not have to hurt. This brought some sort of HOPE in my life, and with that hope I was led to the ultimate love, God. They were, and still, are the people that resembles Jesus’ blessings into their lives. I learned throughout the years being around them that my expectations were set high. I also learned that with establishing a relationship with God, you are able to be specific with him and tell him what you most desire.
Tomorrow you can read part 2.
Massiel is the blogger behind Hello Massiel. She is a mother of two beautiful daughters who keeps her laughing and on the go. In addition, she is also a co-pastor alongside her husband and enjoy serving the community. To read more of her blog click here.
If you haven’t accepted Jesus in your heart and you would like to, here’s a prayer you can pray and get connected to a local church.
Lord Jesus, for too long I’ve kept you out of my life.I know that I am a sinner and that I cannot save myself. No longer will I close the door when I hear you knocking. By faith, I gratefully receive your gift of salvation. I am ready to trust you as my Lord and Savior. Thank you, Lord Jesus, for coming to earth. I believe you are the Son of God who died on the cross for my sins and rose from the dead on the third day. Thank you for bearing my sins and giving me the gift of eternal life. I believe your words are true. Come into my heart, Lord Jesus, and be my Savior. Amen. This prayer is from Dr. Ray Pritchard